alices_nightmare Read online

  “Halt! Who goes there?” demands one of the guards. “Friend of foe?”

  “Friend?” Alice answers hesitantly, all too aware of how burly and brutish the two guards appear, and how knobbly their clubs look.

  “And what is your business at the Palace?” asks the other guard in a high-pitched nasal voice. “Here to see the Queen, I suppose.”

  “Yes, that’s right,” replies Alice, playing along with the unwitting guards now.

  “Then you’ll know what the password is,” says the first, an ugly smug grin creasing his lumpen features.”

  If you want Alice to give the guards a password, turn to 113. If you want Alice to charge the gates, in an attempt to break through, make a note that Alice has the initiative and turn to 163. If you want Alice to use the Curiouser and Curiouser ability at this juncture instead, turn to 86.

  77

  The cake has a strangely familiar taste, like allspice and marzipan. (Regain up to 4 Endurance points.)

  “Curiouser and curiouser!” cries Alice. “I’m opening out like the largest telescope that ever was!”

  Alice looks down at her feet, which seem to be almost out of sight, she is getting so tall.

  Take an Insanity test. If Alice passes the test, turn to 121, but if she fails the test, turn to 107.

  78

  As the first of the Spinebacks comes for her, the second holds back, meaning that Alice can fight the horrors one at a time. (Alice has the initiative.)

  COMBAT ENDURANCE

  First SPINEBACK 87

  Second SPINEBACK 87

  If Alice defeats both of her opponents, turn to 117.

  79

  If the word ‘Phantasm’ is written on Alice’s Adventure Sheet, turn to 128. If not, turn to 153.

  80

  As Alice approaches the tree a low hum fills the air around her. Bees are buzzing about the flower beds, alighting on the trumpets of foxgloves and crawling inside in search of the plants’ sweet nectar, getting their furry legs covered with golden yellow pollen in the process.

  As she strolls between the raised beds, Alice takes a moment to watch the insects at their work. Something hums past her ear, taking her attention away from the business-like bees.

  Lumbering through the mote-shot sunlight, on stained glass wings three feet across, is a carved wooden rocking horse, with its own leather saddle attached and a mane and tail made of genuine horsehair.

  “A Rocking-horse-fly!” Alice says in surprise.

  Crawling on the ground at her feet is another curious insect. Its wings are thin slices of Bread-and-butter, its body is a crust, and its head is a lump of sugar.

  “And I suppose you’re a Bread-and-Butterfly. I hope I don’t bump into an actual Dragon-fly!”

  Alice has only gone a little further when she hears a curious crackling sound. Flying towards her are two more impossible insects, and the largest she has seen so far. Their bodies are plum-puddings, their wings are huge holly-leaves, but most strange of all, their heads look like large raisins burning in brandy, and it is this which is the source of the crackling sound.

  The Snap-dragon-flies dart towards her, their burning raisin heads alive with hot blue flame, and Alice is quite sure that to be burnt by one, or to be grazed by their holly-wings would be more painful than being stung by an angry hornet.

  What should Alice do now?

  Run away as fast as she can? Turn to 50.

  Try to dodge past the insects? Turn to 65.

  Prepare to fend them off?Turn to 112.

  Try to think of a way out of this tricky

  situation? Turn to 35.

  81

  Alice enters another clearing, the towering toadstools which surround it the tallest the child has yet seen since entering this weird woodland. Surely, if she were to climb to the top of one of the colossal fungi she would be able to see for miles.

  An experienced tree-climber, Alice is confident she can climb to the top of one of the toadstools so that she might survey the countryside beyond. If you want her to do this, turn to 91. If not, turn to 488.

  82

  Tumbling head over heels, Alice sees that she is fast approaching a rickety bookcase. If you want her to grab a book from a shelf as she falls past, turn to 102. If you think she should leave her hands free, just in case, turn to 62.

  83

  It is then that the Mouse returns, carrying a tray of tea things.

  “Shall I be mother?” asks Alice, glad of the distraction, and proceeds to pour out four cups of tea. After all that’s happened to her, she doesn’t think it at all strange to be sitting down to tea with a stuffed rabbit pocket watch, a Mouse and a Lizard.

  “Mmm… Earl Grey,” the Mouse says, closing its eyes and savouring the aroma of the hot steam.

  Alice takes a wary sip from her own cup. The tea is indeed delicious and most refreshing. (Add up to 6 Endurance points.)

  “Now, where was I?” the White Rabbit says. “Oh yes, the Queen of Hearts.”

  But before he can say any more the Rabbit is interrupted by a sharp cracking sound and a noise like the internal workings of a watch exploding.

  All eyes turn to the grandfather clock and watch as the timepiece transforms into an almost humanoid form, with the clock’s pendulum swinging from the end of one arm-like appendage, not unlike a flail, while the other ends in the scissoring hands of its face.

  “There is a spy in the camp!” shrieks the Rabbit.

  Walls might have ears, but a clock has a face and hands. The meeting in the study has been observed and now the Queen of Hearts’ spy will eliminate those that threaten her choke-hold on Wonderland.

  First to go is the Mouse. One swing of the pendulum sees to that, caving in the poor creature’s skull and sending the tea things crashing to the floor.

  The return swing sends Bill the Lizard flying into a glass-fronted cabinet of animal skulls, the glass shattering and the woodwork splintering as he lands in a bleeding heap amidst the debris.

  “Run, Alice!” screams the White Rabbit. “Save yourself! Stop the Queen!”

  The animal is abruptly silenced as the clockwork assassin removes his head with a scything sweep of its other arm.

  Alice turns in a panic and throws herself at the door as, with one almighty leap, the transformed Grandfather Clock leaps over the desk, reaching for her with its scissoring clock-hand fingers.

  Take an Agility test. If Alice passes the test, turn to 69. If she fails the test, turn to 56.

  84

  Following the path west, Alice comes to a dead-end. However, strangely, standing before the hedge in front of her is a full-length mirror set within in a polished wood frame. Reflected in the mirror Alice can see the gravel path leading back into the maze… But… But she can’t see herself!

  “I do declare it’s not a mirror at all!” Alice exclaims. She reaches a tentative hand towards the glass and where the glass should be, her hand passes straight through.

  If you want Alice to try stepping through the mirror, and see where it takes her, turn to 104. If not, she will have to retrace her steps through the leafy labyrinth (turn to 70).

  85

  The wind whips waves across the surface of the river, shaking the willows’ whip-like fronds. The thunderous rumbling comes again as the face in the clouds starts to laugh.

  Alice is helpless in the face of the gale. The wind lifts her off her feet and she is tossed about like just another leaf in the storm.

  Sticks and branches whirl about her as the howling gale carries her across the field. She can see the rabbit-hole beneath her now. And then suddenly the wind drops as quickly as it arose and she is falling, plummeting towards the ground, the entrance to the burrow yawning beneath her like a gaping, earthy mouth.

  It is then that a spinning branch hits her on the head, k
nocking her senseless.

  Deduct 2 points from Alice’s Endurance score and turn to 191.

  86

  The gates behind the guards suddenly open of their own accord and a trumpeted fanfare announces the arrival of their captain, accompanied by a troop of club-wielding soldiers. The man is seated upon a snorting warhorse. He has angular, aquiline features, and wears a tabard adorned with embroidered hearts, while his steed’s barding bears the heraldry of the Queen of Hearts.

  “Who have we here?” demands the Captain of the Guard, more knave than knight, as far as Alice is concerned.

  “Alice,” replies Alice.

  “Alice?” the Knave of Hearts bellows. “Seize her at once!”

  Alice is an intelligent girl and realises that to resist arrest now, when faced by a whole troop of soldiers, would be to invite certain death, so she allows the playing card guards to take her prisoner. The guards then march her through the gates, over the drawbridge, and into the palace beyond.

  Turn to 386.

  87

  The snarls of the Spinebacks are suddenly drowned out by a furious croaking cry and a vast shadow falls across the croquet-ground as a monstrous bird swoops down out of the sky. The colossal avian catches one of the hedgehog-like beasts in its long beak before flying away again, as quickly as it appeared, leaving Alice to fight the last remaining mutant. (Alice has the initiative.)

  SPINEBACKCOMBAT 8 ENDURANCE 7

  If Alice defeats her opponent, turn to 117.

  88

  With powerful strokes, Alice swims towards the shore, the sandy spit of land getting closer with every surge of the sea, until at last she staggers from the water, her arms and legs feeling like they’re made of nothing more substantial than blancmange.

  The sun beats down on the child from the azure sky overhead as she takes a moment to rest upon a ledge of rock, and empty her shoes of seawater. Before long her dress starts to dry out too.

  Behind her the beach rises to a range of grass-topped dunes, and beyond those Alice can see the tops of trees interspersed with carefully-tended topiary. Looking left along the beach, Alice spies the entrance to a rocky cove, while to her right the shoreline curves round to a wide bay.

  If you think Alice should investigate the rocky cove first, turn to 138. If you think she should head instead towards the sandy bay, turn to 258. Alternatively, if you think she should just head into the dunes towards the well-tended topiary, turn to 312.

  89

  As the bizarre vivisect-hybrid bears down on her Alice realises that rather than screaming it is singing, its howls distorted by their passage through the water. “Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, will you join the dance?”

  Somehow, the words of the song seem strangely familiar to Alice. And then – she doesn’t understand precisely how – the words of another song entirely enter her mind, unbidden.

  “Beautiful Soup, so rich and green,

  Waiting in a hot tureen!

  Who for such dainties would not stoop?

  Soup of the evening, beautiful Soup!

  Beautiful Soup! Who cares for fish,

  Game, or any other dish?

  Who would not give all else for two

  Pennyworth only of beautiful Soup!

  Beautiful Mock Turtle Soup!”

  At these final words the monstrous creature turns tail and flees, powerful strokes of its paddle-like flippers transporting it back into the darkness of the ocean depths.

  Turn to 118.

  90

  Alice remembers visiting mazes before with her Nurse, and has learnt about the Labyrinth of Crete in classical studies with her Governess, so she feels quite at home here.

  At the next junction, should Alice go north (turn to 24), east (turn to 100), or south (turn to 174)?

  91

  Finding plenty of hand- and foot-holds in the stalk of the vertiginous toadstool, Alice clambers up the stem until she finally hauls herself up onto the cap of the fungus.

  The wonderful landscape of this strange realm is laid out below her like a map. Far to the south she can see the coast and beyond that, even further out in the wave-washed ocean, a gloomy island. To the west she can see a beautiful garden which appears to belong to a grand house that she spies to the north-west. Directly north of the forest is a quaint thatched cottage with a pair of distinctive chimneys, while to the east Alice can see the imposing battlements and turrets of a once imposing, but now rundown, palace. The way to the palace appears to be blocked by a tortuous maze made of tall yew hedges.

  Having learnt all she is going to learn from her vertiginous vantage point, Alice sets off back down the trunk-like stalk of the giant toadstool.

  It is then that she spots the monstrous slug making its way up the stem towards her. She finds its rippling, boneless body quite repellent. “I dread to think what might happen if we were actually to come eye to eye-stalk,” she says.

  There are three different ways for Alice to complete her descent to the forest floor, but which one do you think is the most sensible?

  Fight her way past the Slug? Turn to 181.

  Try to avoid the slug by continuing her

  descent on the other side of the stalk? Turn to 101.

  Allow herself to drop to the ground

  from here? Turn to 151.

  92

  Alice throws the crumbly cake onto the path, close to the tree and almost immediately the Snap-dragon-flies take off after it. Landing on the cake they begin to devour it with rapid scissoring movements of their wasp-like mandibles, leaving Alice able to continue on her way through the garden unhindered.

  Cross the Curious Cake off Alice’s Adventure Sheet (she cannot use it again) and turn to 146.

  93

  “Wrong!” declares the guard. Make a note that the guards have the initiative and turn to 163.

  94

  “Well it’s your dream, so who else do you expect to do it?” asks the White Rabbit in response to Alice’s question.

  “A dream? It’s more like a nightmare.”

  “That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you.”

  “And if you want it to stop, you need to off ‘Er Madge,” the Lizard chips in. “Surest way is with the Vorpal Sword, one swift chop to the neck. Take the ‘ead clean off her shoulders. It’s the only way to be sure with ‘er kind.”

  “Now then, Bill, that’s enough of that. You’ll be giving the poor girl nightmares… Oh, I’m sorry. It’s a little late for that, isn’t it?”

  Turn to 83.

  95

  Does Alice have a Coin? If so, and you still want her to throw it into the fountain, turn to 124. If she doesn’t have a Coin, or you don’t think she should throw it away so carelessly, turn to 241.

  96

  Reaching the rabbit-hole, without a second thought Alice throws herself into the earthy gloom.

  Turn to 57.

  97

  As the Spinebacks come for her, two of the playing card croquet arches unfold themselves and stand upright. The playing card guards’ bodies are oblong and flat, with hands and feet at the corners, and unkind expressions on their furious faces.

  Alice’s attention is drawn straight back to the humanoid hedgehogs as they bear down on her. She must fight the horrors (which have the initiative) at the same time.

  COMBAT ENDURANCE

  First SPINEBACK 8 7

  Second SPINEBACK 8 7

  If Alice defeats the Spinebacks she must then battle the croquet-ground’s Playing Card Guards, taking them on together. (In this case Alice has the initiative.)

  COMBAT ENDURANCE

  First PLAYING CARD GUARD 7 6

  Second PLAYING CARD GUARD 7 6

  If she bests both her opponents, turn to 117.

  98

  Bill lies prone amidst the wreckage
of the broken cabinet. His body is covered in cuts caused by the broken glass and he is breathing heavily.

  “Mr Lizard?” Alice says kneeling down beside him. “Bill? Can you hear me?”

  In response, a guttural snarl issues from the Lizard’s throat.

  “Oh no, it’s happening again!” cries the Rabbit. “Get out of here, Alice. Get out of here now! Don’t do it, Bill,” the Rabbit goes on desperately, “you can control this, you know you can! We’ve done it before, remember? Alice – get out! You won’t like Bill when he’s angry.”

  If you want Alice to leave as quickly as she can, turn to 179. If you want her to stay, turn to 111.

  99

  As the monster lumbers towards Alice, the child is distracted momentarily as a broad tooth-filled grin appears in the air beside her. The smile is soon followed by a head, a body, and last of all a tail, and then the Cheshire Cat is there, ready to fight at her side. Spitting its fury, the grinning animal springs at the reptilian beast, claws and teeth bared.

  Make a note of the fact that the Alice-Jabberwock has suffered one attack and turn to 119.

  100

  Alice is quite enjoying exploring the maze. At the next turn in the path she doesn’t hang about but hurries on her way. But which way does she go?

  North?Turn to 110.