alices_nightmare Read online

West?Turn to 90.

  101

  Alice slides round to the other side of the toadstool’s trunk, but as she does so, she comes into contact with the Slug’s trail of slime.

  Take an Agility test. If Alice passes the test, turn to 131. If she fails the test, she slips on the slime – turn to 151.

  102

  Alice’s fingers close around the cracked leather spine of a slim volume and, as she continues to fall, pulls it from the bookcase.

  The wind whistling about her ears, she flicks through the book but can see no pictures and no obvious conversations. “And what is the use of a book without pictures or conversations?” she asks herself out loud.

  She stops at a page on which is printed a curious poem that reminds her of a rhyme her Nurse used to sing – but which is, at the same time, quite different – and she starts to read:

  “Twinkle, twinkle, little bat!

  How I wonder what you’re at!

  Up above the world you fly,

  Like a tea tray in the sky.

  Twinkle, twinkle, little bat!

  How I wonder what you’re at!”

  “What a curious poem,” Alice says, and then starts as the book in her hands begins to twitch.

  As she watches, the book transforms, the cracked leather cover becoming the flapping wings of a large bat, the loosened leaves of its pages fluttering into the air around her. And then she is holding a large, and very angry bat in her hands, which gives a shrill high-pitched shriek, exposing elongated fangs.

  Take an Insanity test. If Alice passes the test, turn to 200. If she fails the test, turn to 214.

  103

  Opening the red cloth-bound book, Alice begins to read:

  One winter night, at half-past nine,

  Cold, tired, and cross, and muddy,

  I had come home, too late to dine,

  And supper, with cigars and wine,

  Was waiting in the study.

  There was a strangeness in the room,

  And Something white and wavy

  Was standing near me in the gloom—

  I took it for the carpet-broom

  Left by that careless slavey.

  “What a curious poem,” says Alice. She can almost imagine the strangeness in the room as she reads the verse and evens fancies she can see something white and wavy standing there between the bookcases.

  If you think Alice should keep reading, turn to 514. If you think she has tarried in the library long enough, turn to 504.

  104

  Taking a deep breath, Alice steps up to the mirror and then, in another moment she is through the glass.

  She is standing at another dead-end in the maze, with another mirror set within a polished wood frame behind her. Checking by the sun overhead, she realises that the gravel path will set her on a course heading west into the labyrinth.

  If you want Alice to follow this new path through the maze, turn to 490. If you would prefer her to step back through the looking-glass, turn to 154.

  105

  “A villain referred to only as the Carpenter,” replies the Rabbit in hushed tones, his voice wavering. “I would call him the Queen’s executioner, only he doesn’t actually kill anyone. Would that he did,” the Rabbit adds with a shudder.

  “Vivisection is his game,” says the Lizard. “’Off with ‘is head’ is only the beginning; it’s what he does with your head afterwards you want to worry about. Taxidermy’s just a hobby to him, something he practises on the side.”

  A vivisectionist who chops up people and animals only to put them back together in grotesque ways? And Alice thought she has seen all the horrors that Wonderland had to offer already. (Add 1 to Alice’s Insanity score.)

  “Now don’t go scaring the poor girl, Bill!” the White Rabbit says.

  Wringing his cap in his hands whilst looking at the floor, the Lizard makes his apology: “Begging your pardon, miss.”

  Turn to 83.

  106

  “This must be the tomb of the White King!” Alice declares in both excitement, and shock at the implications of what this means.

  Before Alice’s eyes, the stone sword held in the marble hands of the carved king at his repose, begins to glow with an inner luminescence. When the light fades again the sword in the White King’s hands is stone no more, but a gleaming steel blade, etched with runes of power.

  “The Vorpal Sword!” Alice says in a reverent whisper.

  Her awed reverie is disturbed by the arrival of another within the mausoleum. Standing within the arch at the top of the stairs is a knight clad in a suit of blood-red armour, his face hidden behind the closed visor of his helm.

  The Red Knight says nothing but drawing his black iron blade crosses the chamber, sword raised, and Alice instinctively understands that once again she is expected to fight for her life.

  If you are able to and want to use The Pen is Mightier ability now, turn to 484. If you are either not able or not willing, turn to 292.

  107

  Alice continues to grow until her head hits the roof of the hall and she is more than nine feet high. Unable to believe her very particular predicament, Alice peers down at the tiled floor – the tiles looking like the tiny tesserae of a mosaic, to the overgrown Alice – and bursts into tears. (Add 1 to Alice’s Insanity score.)

  “You ought to be ashamed of yourself,” Alice chides herself, “a great girl like you to go on crying in this way! Stop this moment, I tell you!”

  But she can’t stop and goes on shedding gallons of tears, until there is a large pool all around her, reaching half down the hall.

  A creeping realisation comes over her. “I’ve been in a situation very like this before. I think I even remember saying those self-same words. Let me see if I can remember what happened next.”

  It is then that a very peculiar rhyme pops into Alice’s mind, and she finds herself inadvertently reciting it out loud:

  “How doth the little crocodile

  Improve his shining tail,

  And pour the waters of the Nile

  On every golden scale!”

  Alice is suddenly aware that her shoes and stockings are getting wet.

  “That was a narrow escape! I must be shrinking again,” she says, the pool of tears seeming to rise as she shrinks toward it (only now it is a veritable Sea of Tears, the walls of the hall having vanished into the distance) until – splash! – she finds herself treading water to keep her head above the briny waves.

  It is then that she spies two reptilian eyes blinking at her from just above the surface of the water, followed by a line of bronze protrusions covering a ridged back and the slowly lashing tail steering the crocodilian form.

  “And now things are worse than ever,” the poor child declares, as the crocodile glides towards her.

  If you think that now would be a good time to use The Pen is Mightier ability, turn to 203. If you think Alice should prepare to defend herself, turn to 182.

  108

  And then the vision changes again and Alice is standing before an ivory tower, overgrown with creepers, within a sinister wood, even as the mists start to thicken about her again. “Whoever lives here?” wonders Alice in a dreamy way.

  “Come back,” comes the Caterpillar’s distant voice again. “Come back…”

  If you think Alice should answer the Caterpillar’s summons, turn to 185. If you want Alice to enter the ivory tower instead, turn to 129.

  109

  Taking something from the cupboard whilst falling down the well isn’t going to be as easy as perhaps it sounds.

  Take an Agility test. If Alice passes the test, turn to 133. If she fails the test, turn to 156.

  110

  Mounted on a granite pedestal at the next turning of the trail is a curious statue of an old man balancing an eel on the end of his nose. Which way
now?

  East? Turn to 140.

  South? Turn to 100.

  111

  The Lizard gives another snarling hiss, causing Alice to take a wary step away from him, but she cannot tear her eyes away from poor Bill when he too starts to undergo his own terrible transformation.

  Bill’s body seems to swell with every breath he takes, causing his gardener’s shirt to split at the seams. As the tatters of his clothes fall from his ever-expanding body so his snout elongates and his tail grows, becomes longer and thicker.

  But it is not only Bill’s clothes that are coming apart, his skin is splitting too, the tears following the gashes caused by the broken shards of glass.

  Shaking off his shed skin, and now standing on all fours, Bill the Lizard turns his attention to Alice. His eyes burn red and his mouth is full of saurian fangs as long as steak knives. The White Rabbit’s gardener is Bill the Lizard no longer; now he has become Bill the Basilisk and he is blocking Alice’s way out of the room.

  I you want Alice to use The Pen is Mightier ability to save herself, turn to 122. If not, Alice will have to fight for her life once again (turn to 142).

  112

  The two Snap-dragon-flies buzz towards Alice with angry intent, and no sign of festive spirit.

  If you want to use The Pen is Mightier ability to help Alice escape her fate, and you are still able to do so, turn to 393. If not, turn to 126.

  113

  “Go on then. What is the password?” the guard challenges Alice. What should she say in reply?

  “Off with their heads!” Turn to 73.

  “Jam tarts!” Turn to 93.

  “We’re all mad here!” Turn to 143.

  114

  Before her is another long passage. There is no sign of the White Rabbit but she can hear the tick and rattle of clockwork coming from somewhere up ahead.

  There’s not a moment to lose. Chasing off down the passage Alice turns a corner and finds herself in a long, low hall, lit by lamps hanging from the roof. There are doors all around the hall but what has really attracted her attention are the two stick-like figures stalking towards her on pin-like legs.

  Although they are shaped like men, they most definitely are not men, since they are quite clearly made from pieces of metal, and their visible innards look like the workings of a clock.

  Tick-tock, tick-tock, go the clock mechanisms as the metal men stalk towards her, a sinister glint in their watch-case eyes. Tick-tock, tick-tock.

  The horrid vision of these clockwork creations, their brass body parts glinting in the lamplight, fills Alice with dread. (Add 1 to Alice’s Insanity score.) Quaking in fear, her face as white as a sheet, what should Alice do now?

  To try to dodge past the advancing Tick-Tock Men, turn to 5. To try talking to the clockwork creations, turn to 226. To attack the Tick-Tock Men, before they can attack Alice, turn to 169. For Alice to try to think her way out of such a dangerous situation, turn to 246. To use Alice’s Curiouser and Curiouser ability, turn to 130.

  115

  “Jabberwocky!” the child says with a confidence befitting someone much older than her tender eleven years.

  “You may pass!” declares the guard.

  The two burly brutes heave open the gates, letting Alice out of the maze and into the palace.

  Turn to 446.

  116

  “Surely you remember Her Majesty,” the Rabbit gasps in disbelief. “Foul-tempered ruler of Wonderland, quick to pass a sentence of death for the slightest offense. ‘Off with their heads!’ No?”

  “What happened to the King of Hearts?” asks Alice, shaking her head.

  “Best not to ask.”

  The Lizard draws a finger across his throat whilst making a strange clicking noise from the side of his mouth.

  “Hearsay and rumour, Bill. Hearsay and rumour!” chides the White Rabbit.

  “But look what she had done to you!” the Lizard says pointedly.

  “Now don’t go getting yourself all het up. You know what happens when you get worked up. And you know what they say about walls and ears too. We can’t be too careful, not with her Tick-Tock Men about.”

  Turn to 83.

  117

  Having endured such an unpleasant encounter at the strange croquet-ground, Alice is more than happy to be on her way. But which way is she going?

  East? Turn to 250.

  West?Turn to 58.

  118

  Exhausted by her encounter with the Mock Turtle, Alice lets the current carry her where it will until finally she is washed up on the sandy shore. The sun beats down on the child as she takes a moment to rest upon a ledge of rock, empty her shoes of water and untangle strands of seaweed from her hair. Before long her dress has started to dry out as well.

  Beyond the shore, the beach rises to a range of grass-topped dunes, and beyond those Alice can see the tops of trees interspersed with carefully-tended topiary. Looking left along the beach, Alice spies the entrance to a rocky cove, while to her right the shoreline curves round to a wide bay.

  If you think Alice should investigate the rocky cove, turn to 138. If you think she should head towards the sandy bay, turn to 258. If you think she should just head into the dunes towards the well-tended topiary, turn to 312.

  119

  If the word ‘Metamorphosis’ is recorded on Alice’s Adventure Sheet, turn to 322. If not, turn to 231.

  120

  “Why, an hourglass has the most moving parts,” Alice says, feeling very pleased with herself, “because it is full of so many grains of sand.”

  One by one, Alice rotates the brass triangle so that it lines up with each letter of the word in turn, giving it one full rotation for the last ‘S’ just to be sure.

  Hearing a click, she looks down to see something drop out of a hole that has appeared in the column of the plinth. Bending down, Alice picks it up between finger and thumb.

  It is a shiny gold Coin. She would have said that it was a sovereign, but she doesn’t recognise the Queen’s face on the reverse. Nonetheless, Alice is delighted with her prize and pops it into her pinafore pocket before continuing on her way.

  Add 1 to Alice’s Logic score for solving the puzzle, and turn to 31.

  121

  “Curiouser and curiouser and curiouser!” Alice exclaims as she continues to grow until her head hits the ceiling and she is more than nine feet tall! (Add one more Curiouser and Curiouser box to Alice’s Adventure Sheet.)

  “What a curious cake,” Alice says, looking at the crumbling remains lying in the palm of her huge hand. “I wonder, if I only ate half as much would only grow half as tall?” And with that thought she wraps what is left of the cake in its greaseproof paper case and pops it into her pinafore pocket.

  There are two pieces of cake remaining. If Alice eats one she can add 4 Endurance points, and if she does so before a battle, she can add 1 to her Combat score for the duration of said battle. (Add the Curious Cake to Alice’s Adventure Sheet.)

  Just as Alice is adjusting to her new size, and imagining all the things she could do now that she’s taller – such as pick apples without needing a ladder, or have a conversation with a giraffe – her body starts to shrink again and soon she is back to her normal size. Clearly the effects of curious cake are only temporary.

  Turn to 164.

  122

  Suddenly a face appears at the window. It is that of a Weasel, dressed in a similar manner to Bill before his unfortunate transformation.

  “’Ere, what’s going on?” the Weasel shouts, throwing open the window and climbing into the study. “Is that you, Bill?”

  Upon seeing the mustelid, the Basilisk gives a furious hiss, smashing through the study door in its hurry to escape the new arrival.

  “Come back ‘ere, you!” the Weasel shouts as it sets off in
pursuit, leaving Alice alone in the study. She listens as the Basilisk crashes through the house, overturning furniture and breaking windows, until it finds its way out through the front door and an eerie stillness falls over the place once more.

  Turn to 168.

  123

  Knowing of no way off the island, the child sits down on the floor and starts to weep. Her adventure is over.

  THE END

  124

  Taking the golden Coin from the pocket of her pinafore, Alice casts it into the fountain while making her wish. But what does she wish for?

  The agility of an ape? Turn to 144.

  The wisdom of an owl? Turn to 161.

  The ferocity of a unicorn? Turn to 206.

  The strength of a lion? Turn to 221.

  Peace of mind? Turn to 187.

  125

  Taking the Vorpal Sword in both hands, Alice plunges it into the vampire’s shrivelled black heart. The Red Queen gives a gasp and then a soul-wrenching scream as her undead form dies at last. Her body bursts into flame and quickly burns down to nothing but ash, which is then blown away on the powerful wind that suddenly howls through the Palace.

  But as the Red Queen’s remains are blown to the four winds, so the walls of the palace start to dissolve and melt away like mist…

  Blinking the sleep from her eyes, Alice yawns and stretches, finding herself back home in the drawing room, curled up in a corner of the great arm-chair, with a dear little black kitten, sitting in her lap, the cat purring contentedly to herself as she washes her face with a paw.